SO, it's been 3 months since I have "blogged". I have started and stopped myself MaNy times! I just start off with thoughts......go off on a tangent and then feel like "well, it's just too much to say all at once." But I have learned something these last few months------THAT is who I am. I have a whole bunch to say, several ways to say it and frankly I must start saying it. I have decided that NOT all will love what I say......I have concluded that SOME will not finish reading it.......BUT I am satisfied knowing that one may read and agree with me and I am fine with that. :0) Praying it's actually more than one that feel the same as I-----But I have to start somewhere, right?!
So let's start with today's thought! Today at church, they showed my testimony video. It was AmAzInG!! Jason D did an incredible job with the entire thing! Totally creative and insightful and just WOW! So here's a link to it and then I will continue on about the whole experience of it all......
http://vimeo.com/16623626
So when I got the email requesting for me to come in and "testify".....I must admit I um, tossed a tad bit of cookies. I was totally freaking out!! I mean really? You want me to tell my story of my journey to Haiti?! The time in my life when I really SAW God in ways I had NeVeR seen HIM before!!! Am I gonna cry? (yes) Will I stutter? (probably) Will I say a bunch of junk nobody care to hear about? (likely) BUT will I, can I bring glory to His name? Can I testify and show people how Haiti has changed me forever? Can I put into words the incredible difference He made in all of this? How about how the "past Pamela" would NEVER have done this and now that me and God have this intense relationship----I wanna go to the hard places for HIM!! Can I do that? Can I verbalize all of it? I decided He was giving me an opportunity to do so..........maybe someone is teetering on wether to go to Haiti or not----and my video say to them "GO"?! Maybe ONE person will see God working.....and then it's worth it, just one--right?!
So I did it! I cried almost the whole time they filmed and honestly don't remember all that I said. Then I waited. I waited to see it during service, to see it while sitting with my family, to see it in it's "element". I waited ever so patiently (most days) for what seemed like forever. Then Jason D sent me a copy of it to see a few days early........and so I put the kiddo's down for naps and I put it on. I watched it 8 times in a row! I cried harder and harder every time! I had a total "come to Jesus" moment right in front of my laptop. I was witnessing to myself in a crazy way!! I was watching the change that God promises to those who call on His name.........It was like looking into a mirror and seeing the love of Christ staring right back at me. I am a changed woman! And I SAW it for myself!!
Today, our pastor spoke about giving testimony to people........about how we have a before and after story. And WOW do I have a before story that would knock your socks off! I could go on and on about my before----and trust me, I love to tell it because the AFTER makes it SO precious!!! But today I was blessed to see my AFTER. It was right there on a big screen.....and while holding hands with my husband and my mother-----I was a witness to the change that can ONLY come with a relationship with GOD and it was MY relationship with HIM that I was seeing. And I loved it!!! I LOVE HIM!!!
Thank you dear Lord Jesus for saving me and washing me clean of sin!!! I was headed straight for hell a few years ago......But now my road is narrowing and my love for you is growing and our relationship is deepening and I am COMPELLED BY THE LOVE OF CHRIST!! AMEN!!
